Schadenfreude, how come you taste so good?

I don't know if former Acting Navy Jerkface Thomas Modly quit, was fired, or has found a new gig as Head of the Staff Motivation Unit, Human Resources Division, at Trump Hotels, Inc.

I do know that he was either too naive or too stupid to be the commanding officer of a department like the U.S. Navy.

Ha.

Ooh la la!

Racinette = Root beer. At least in Canadian French.

Illustrating once again that everything sounds better in French.

Murderous waxen dolls of the Trump administration

Oh, thank you for this, Jezebel! It's an excellent start to defining That Jared Kushner Look. 

Nonetheless, at the risk of seeming exceedingly prissy with a slammed-shut sphincter--you know, like Jared himself--I would offer that you may have slightly misread some of the visual cues La Jared is providing to his fanbase/victims.

One part murderous waxen doll? ✅

One part flopsweaty racist rich boy? ✅

But you completely left out--

• Sloe-eyed vamp who lounges in a shimmery, gossamer negligee and a blonde wig while smoking from a cigarette holder, insisting that everyone call him Lady Ivanka before they can speak to him.

(I for one have always thought it was no accident that Jared's gender was at one time listed on his New York State voter registration as female. Rather, I view it as a desperate cry to live his truth.)

• Serial killer with an almost imperceptible eye twitch who discusses the sudden turn in the weather with the police while they conduct a search of a heretofore secret warehouse, at which they overlook the walk-in freezer filled with steaks, roasts, and sausages, prepared with care and contentment by Jared's 3rd disassociated identity, The Consummate Host. The Host has crafted these fine meats from the fleshy remains of tenants who wouldn't leave his properties once evicted and will soon serve a sampling of said snacks at the next Trump family barbecue. 

But not to worry! Everything's kosher as Jared drained his victims of all blood prior to preparation.

Still, the meat treats are a little ... well, chewy. Sorry, JK! I dunno, maybe if you used less murderous wax in the recipe?