The Russian Bearcat

Last night, I dreamed that my Mom, my sister, my brother, and my (late) Dad and I went to Russia for vacation.

Apparently, my Dad was friends with Vladimir Putin, so we were treated like visiting heads of state. On the first day of our trip, Vlad met us at breakfast to present us with a vehicle to drive around the country on our tour--a vintage Stutz Bearcat. (It sort of looked like this but was somehow a more modern version, more of a Stutz Bearcat with Studebaker Avanti stylings.)

My Mom insisted on driving it, even though I wasn't sure she could drive a stick. (She can.) However, Vlad was trying to find a replacement. He was embarrassed that this was a one-seater when we clearly needed space for five. Six if other (late) brother was going to join later, as planned.

I then told Vlad about my trip to the then Soviet Union in 1984 [author's note: which actually happened]. Somehow we bonded. "You know, [Montag]"--he spoke English with a nearly perfect American accent--"When you were visiting my country in 1984, I was working as a [mumble] in a factory in [mumble]," he said. "I used to hide in a closet in the bathroom and listen to the conversations that people had. This is how I first became interested in spying."

And then I woke up, unfortunately. If I'd managed to stay asleep longer, I might have information that could foster world peace.