I am Sackashit Fierce!

Oh, honey, that sounds like a dare.

Cryptkeeperella, I know you see yourself as all Ilsa She-Wolf of the SS, but even the Nazis didn't last forever. And they had plans for a thousand year Reich, when y'all can't even get through Infrastructure Week without falling on your asphalt.

And they didn't see the end coming either.

It's an unfact!

Kellyanne Conway's grade school primer revealed.

Don't think too much about the use of the word "golden" in the title.

On second thought, maybe you should.

Star-Spangled Girl, or, Kellyanne's Kustom Kostume

Gurrrrrrl, please. 

This is what happens when you alienate all your gay male friends. They let you leave the house looking like a scarecrow in Revolutionary War drag. Or as a friend put it, "looking like a cashier at Burger Chef during the Bicentennial."

Thoughts and prayers, Kellyanne, thoughts and prayers.